Mental illness is setting in from acute beer obsession. As I read more beer books, certain terms always strike me as odd or weird sounding. Some terms I would even be afraid to say in front of my grandmother; who wants to sound like he’s being filthy around the grams? Anyway, I decided to start another small series with some of the funnier terms. We’ll be calling it “Beer Terms that Sound Bad.”
Flocculation- Sounds like: Something that might happen after a really good prom night.
Actually is: When yeast and other particulate matter drops out of the beer and settles to the bottom.
Endosperm- Sounds like: Something that you would do if attempting to have a child or were absolutely sure that birth control was being used.
Actually is: Starch containing portion of the grain used to make the sugar necessary for alcohol fermentation.
Dry Hopping-Sounds like: An unsuccessful date with a painful result.
Actually is: When dry hops are added to a beer after the boiling period. Normally, while the beer matures.
Germination- Sounds like: 1. What the Nazis were trying to create / 2. What will happen when the swine flu actually spreads.
Actually is: When the barley seed comes out of storage mode and makes possible its use for malting.
Aflatoxin- Sounds like: Antibiotics will be needed from risky behavior.
Actually is: Mold culture toxins that grow in various beer adjuncts from excessive water, bad temperature control, or poor air circulation of various beer adjuncts.
Amylopectins-Sounds like: Low-hanging man boobs.
Actually is: Starch chains that branch (and have to be broken down).
Chit, or Chit Malt-Sounds like: 1. Something you’d say if you dropped a keg on your foot; 2. If the malt was bad, you’d call it “chit malt.”
Actually is: White tip on a barley kernel where the embryo is.
Cones-Sounds like: Something Madonna wore or slang for breasts.
Actually is: Many things. Hop cones, bottom of certain fermentation tanks, or shape in which sediment takes when stirred to form a whirlpool.
Decoction mashing-Sounds like: German slang for masturbation.
Actually is: Part of the mash is taken out, cooked for a short interval, and put back in to raise overall temperature.
There are plenty more to come.
I am particularly uncomfortable with the beer term, “bung.” Especially since a “bung” is placed in a “bung hole.”
Maybe it’s just me …. I’m sure I’ll get over it.
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Bung is a good one. The only good thing is you could say this beer taste like bung alright.
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Bung hole… do you have any TP?
Yeah, I knew that term but had no idea what it was until I had been brewing a while. Prior to that revelation, it evoked (still does, truthfully) memories of Beavis & Butthead.
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Thanks, Great Cornholio
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Flocculation always sounded like flatulation to me.
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Nate said that, too.
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Hahaha someone beat me to the bung hole comment.
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[...] Beer terms that sound bad part I | Thank Heaven for Beer thankheavenforbeer.com/2009/08/25/beer-terms-that-sound-bad-part-i – view page – cached I’m a geek. We’ve decided to write down some beer terms that could easily be taken as saying something bad, filthy, or disgusting…we’re having fun. — From the page [...]
I actually encountered some flocculation, while dry hopping cones that were decoction mashing. Haha. Good stuff though, Mike….informative and hilarious. I haven’t been on here for a while, and just realized i shouldn’t take as much time to get on here again. I’ll keep reading and passing the word along.
-Your Bro
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Thanks, Rich! Ladies and germs…my younger brother. Also funny stuff! I’m glad to see you on here and leaving a comment.
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