Disclaimer: This is not directed at anyone in particular. Don't be self-absorbed and think that I'm talking specifically about you. I'm always critical of the person who exclusively drinks macro beer. In fact, I can be critical of someone who drinks them with any regularity. Now that I work in a liquor store, I've observed a phenomenon. Mr. Regular comes in and buys the same old beer every time. He walks in and grabs Natural Light. He knows exactly where it's at, how much it costs and has the exact change. "Put it in a bag," he says. Who can blame him? I would hide it, too. What else can he be doing but hiding the fact that he bought worthless beer for the purpose of inebriation? It can't be that he really believes that walking out a liquor store won't be perceived as buying beer, so long as he has it in a bag. This article is not really about that; let people have bags if they want to feel fancy or do it out of habit. All I can say is that if variety is the spice ...

It is no secret to those who have drunk the kool-aid (code for beer) and joined the clandestine community of beer lovers that this week (May 11th - 17th) is officially American Craft Beer Week. "Aaaaagggghhhh." That was me breathing a sigh of relief of not being guilted into heading down to the Hallmark shop to buy a card for my secretary (as if I had one) or reproduce a picture of my pooch for my vet simply to belong as a cog in mass consumerism.   Rather, it is a relief to participate in a holiday I believe in (not to be trumped by Christmas, Easter, or my wife';s birthday, mind you!). Yes, there are many holidays.  Too many in fact, but this one resonates, because someday Mike, myself, and many of you (Big Tex, for one) hope to be recognized as one of the 1500 craft brewers in the US, who daily struggle to work to produce a fine bubbly beverage that eases the burdens that have accumulated on the weary shoulders of Americas working class.  I for one, pledge to drink fine craft beer for the duration of this fine holiday, and I suggest you, dear reader, do the same.  ...

Does anyone listen to the radio? I try to avoid it like the plague. Why? I'm tired of hearing the same old songs. Now that everybody else is tired of hearing the same old songs, there's a new brilliant idea that has come up: remake the same old songs with different people. Let's hear their deconstructionist interpretation of an already overdone (and sometimes crappy) song. What's worse is that the new artist (in the majority of cases) makes an old, good song terrible. I heard a Moody Blues remake the other day that made me puke...metaphorically, of course. But it's become intolerable. Even worse, teens hear this "new" song and are completely ignorant of the original artist. I see some analogous things happening in the beer world. Luckily, this is not strictly true for everything. I'm not an iconoclast by any means when it comes to beer. However, I do like something new or a new spin on an old style. If I had a brewery, I think that I'd mix between making good versions of traditional styles, spins on old styles, and real boundary pushers. Some breweries, like ...

In a past post we discussed stereotypes a bit in a nonjudgmental and humorous attitude. It occurred to those who participated in the discussion that it might be fun to take to higher, beer level, since for the most part, the posts on this blog lean toward the rote information.  So occasionally, we will post a picture of an individual(s) and as our readers to do that which are politically-correct-obsessed society detests...stereotype the face(s) associated with the post.  What do they drink?  Why do they drink it? Where do they drink it?  Where do they buy their clothes?...the sky is the limit.  Just try to be nice.  We here at Thank Heaven For Beer don't mean to offend...in fact, eventually our own mugshots will be the face to be stereotyped.  We applaud diversity (as long is it walks, talks, looks, and smells like us) just as we do sarcastic humor. With out further ado...stereotype these guys:

Here at Thank Heaven for Beer, we occasionally attempt to point out certain positive factors of beer--see this article or this article for example--that are not apparent as the obviously divine flavor.  We do so, because quite honestly, so often the negative factors are the ones that come to mind for many.  We are not so arrogant so as to not admit that, yes...there are evils associated with beverage.  But, just as one might be quick to cry cirrhosis at the sound of beer, one could also cry obesity or heart disease at the sound of Big Mac.  Thus, I hope you enjoy this heart warming story... Beer did indeed save the life of a young child tonight.  Tonight as my family and I left our favorite purveyor of fine carbonated beverages, I cradled my beloved purchase gently:  a bottle of Collaboration Not Litigation Ale (review coming soon).  This bottle had to be pampered and kept upright, as I did not want to wait all of tonight and tomorrow for the unfiltered floaties to settle. After all seat belts had been buckled, I took off through the parking lot at around 8 MPH.  Usually (at my wife's disdain) I tear through parking ...

Number 10: Style or "current type" obsession This level of geekdom can really be one of the most annoying. With the style or "current type" obsession, the beer geek argues the merits and superiority of the favorite type. "IPAs are just so much better because of the crazy amount of hops; that's why I've had 400 different ones and have hops injections once a week." "Man! You've got to drink only Oatmeal Stouts for the next month, that's all I'm drinking." You get the idea. Number 9: Beer annoyance If you talk about beer to the point that it annoys people, then you are a beer geek. Does it even get to the point that you don't mind being annoying as long as you get to keep talking about beer? Can you name a person or two that you've made seriously consider jumping off a bridge rather than hear you drone on about beer? Have you discovered ways to work it into a conversation that has no remote connection to beer? Have you gone to AA meetings in order to find people who are eager to talk about beer? Number 8: Beeraphernalia You have more than just beer. ...

Language can be twisted and turned into a semantic nightmare to the point that a negative term can be manipulated and utilized for positive purposes and vice-versa.  For example.  BAD ASS (sorry...I really don't curse...this just came to mind).  Two negative terms twisted by pop culture to mean COOL.  "That car is BAD ASS" actually hails praise for the automobile.  On the other side, a positive term can alter meaning to disguise that which otherwise would sound reprehensible.  I think of Bill Clinton, who, while addressing a tax weary nation informed them that his fiscal legislation was the American people's opportunity to make an investment (unwilling) into their nation.  In this case the positive term, investment, cleverly sugar coated the more harsh, new taxes. No offense to Bill...he plays a heck of a sax! Such is the case, in my opinion with the terms beer geek and beer snob. Beer snob has become a desirable label within the beer community.  Typically, beer snob, is a self applied label a person with an insignificant self esteem applies to themselves.  Beer snobs tend to be more about about the label than the beer.  They tend to think of themselves as more sophisticated than ...

It is my opinion that those who gripe and complain about forwards in their email inbox do so tongue in cheek.  Really...who doesn't enjoy a good forward.  And even if the forward is terrible, there is a certain excitement in opening the forward.  If it's good, you enjoy a good chuckle.  If it falls short, you enjoy the opportunity to employ deconstructive criticism. Surprisingly, today I received my first "beer" forward.  How is it that I have co-owned a beer blog for half a year and this is my first beer forward??? So before you enjoy the forward that brought a much needed laugh, search your inbox and send me the best forward you've got.  Email me by clicking HERE.  So without further ado... ...Fwd:  History 101:  The Condensed Version > History 101 > > For those that don't know about history ... Here is a condensed version: > > Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter. > > The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the ...

Encounters with the netherworld are hardly verifiable.  Nonetheless, here is my account, subjective as it may be. Recently, on a dark and cold evening, my wife and I were enjoying the silence in the house.  She, watching her program; me sitting in the dining room writing for Thank Heaven For Beer.  Suddenly, Sandra, a bit bothered, asked, Do you hear that noise? I stopped and listened.  Sure enough there it was:  grrrrrghhhstt It sounded much like a person pulling a heavy object across the sidewalk outside.  It must be our neighbors, I concluded, as they are a noisy bunch. But alas, the vexatious noise persisted to the point that neither I nor my wife could ignore it any longer.  We began peering out the cracks in our drawn shades, hoping to catch a glimpse of the vile perpetrator.  But all was calm.  We hurried to the basements steps and listened.  Nothing.  We checked on the children.  Fast asleep. I came and sat next to my wife.  We sat in eerie silence, thoughts of poltergeists and ghouls flooding our thoughts.  Suddenly, I was able to pinpoint the source infiltrating our home...it was coming from the coat closet.  That is when it hit me.  There is no ...

I feel a bit like Doogie Howser Dark Lord, M.D.  Herein lies my diary for purchasing tickets:  I should be sleeping.  Why am I awake right now?  I'm waiting to get some Dark Lord "Golden Tickets" from Three Floyds.  What else can be done?  With an imminent move to California, I can't expect to be around for next year.  Who wants to pay more than double the price on Ebay?  Don't take this as just a complaint.  Many good things in life require waiting and patience.  So, I'm just telling the reader that I'm waiting. The only thing that would make a wait like this disappointing is if I didn't get any tickets, which is the only way to guarantee the chance to get a "set number" of bottles.  No one quite knows what this means yet since Three Floyds hasn't released their yields.  But my success or failure in this mission is going to be the difference in me being snappy and tired or just being tired in the a.m.  I'm actually going to finish this article with the results of the mission but am killing time while I wait.  Join me on this journey.     The really weird thing ...