This is our fourth attempt to do the uncouth: intentionally stereotype, our first attempt was a tad fun as was the last (and my favorite, “Partying Dudes”). You see, in a past post we discussed stereotypes a bit in a nonjudgmental and humorous attitude. It occurred to those who participated in the discussion that it might be fun to take to higher, beer level, since for the most part, the posts on this blog lean toward the rote information.
So occasionally, we will post a picture of an individual(s) and as our readers to do that which are politically-correct-obsessed society detests…stereotype the face(s) associated with the post. What do they drink? Why do they drink it? Where do they drink it? Where do they buy their clothes?…the sky is the limit. Just try to be nice. We here at Thank Heaven For Beer don’t mean to offend…in fact, our own mugshots have faced the ridicule of Stereotype Me. We applaud diversity (as long is it walks, talks, looks, and smells like us) just as we do sarcastic humor.
With out further ado…stereotype this tower of baldness:
Well,
Larry, Mo, and Curly here are definitely moonshine drinkers. They don’t buy commercial beer because they can’t be sure that a minority didn’t touch the product or have a job at the factory. Note the flag in the background, which appeals to all God-fearing whites for race domination through buying their moonshine. Ironically, the guy atop the picture killed the one on the bottom because his casio watch was certainly a breach of their “support the whites only” ideology. The chap in the middle really got into hip-hop just a short time after the picture, thus creating the initial rift in the group. Obviously, he’s the only non-inbred member of the group, which accounts for the lack of glasses. However, the moonshine did eventually effect his eyesight…he doesn’t even realize that’s wood paneling and not real wood behind him.
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Please don’t stop reading our site…guy at the top. It was all in fun!
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These guys are obviously Alaska fishermen at home between seasons. The guy on the bottom found that casio watch in the belly of a Cod that he gutted for fun one day. Casio…It takes a licking and keeps on ticking! They all had to shave their heads because of a bet they lost at the start of the season. They drink bud, and lots of it, when they want to feel sophisticated they switch the Kokanee. They drink well liquor, and the guy in the middle was once shunned for three weeks because before they went out on their crab boat he ordered a screaming orgasm at the local bar in Dutch Harbor. They have all sank snow mobiles while trying to cross unfrozen water at high speed. They love Steve O and have all tried to staple their scrotum’s to their leg. The guy on the bottom went on America’s Got Talent where he juggled a King Crab, a Bowling Ball and a Chain Saw. He no longer fishes because he lost his right hand in a freak juggling accident.
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These boys live together in a mobile home court just outside of El Dorado, Arkansas. One night as they all were singing, “bad boys, bad boys, what you gonna do when they come for you,” as they combed their pirated cable television in search of their favorite show, “Cops,” they stumbled across a live performance of “The Blue Man Group.” They were hooked. They shaved their heads and began practicing their moves behind the 711 station. This was in the late 90′s. They can still be found laughing, rehearsing, hugging, and drinking Icehouse out behind the 711 to this day.
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These rednecks go for the “red draw”, sometimes also called a chelada. It helps get them up for their dance routine to “No Phone” by CAKE. It’s stoopid-dope.
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I’m not sure what kinda beer they like, I’m only sure that one of them is wearing pants. The other two, I dunno. Adds a whole new wrinkle to the picture.
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That does put a creepy spin on things, Jim. Which one is wearing the pants?
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